Install this theme
Here’s the dirty little secret about this though: there is no such thing as withholding sex because there is no situation in which you owe another human being sex. Ever. Your body is 100% your own and you get to consent or not consent to other people doing things to or with your body for whatever the hell reason you would like. This includes because you’re pissed off at the person, because they did something you didn’t like, because you just don’t fucking feel like it, because you’re tired, because you don’t feel attractive, because you’d rather read a book…any of the above. And not wanting to have sex with someone because you have negative feelings towards them at a given moment is not in fact punishment. It’s actually a very natural human feeling not to want to be physically intimate with someone when you’re annoyed/angry/hurt/sad with them. Oddly enough letting someone be close to your body when you don’t feel emotionally close to them doesn’t always feel great (if that’s your thing then go for it, but for those who don’t like it then there is no fucking reason to apologize).

But the idea that you can pull some sort of power play in a relationship by not giving the other person something which you don’t owe to them in the first place makes no sense. It would be like telling your partner that you’re going to punish them by not baking them chocolate chip cookies every day: sure, maybe they would like those cookies but in no way are you obligated to bake them cookies anyway, so they should probably be just fine getting along without it. The idea that you should feel as if the only way you can express that you’re angry or upset or unhappy in your relationship is by taking ownership over your body in a way that is so basic it should never have been a question is somewhat disgusting. If your partner has you so convinced that you owe them sex, no wonder you feel a little angry or vindictive towards them.

Rewatching Buffy and this is honestly the first time it’s struck me how gross and creepy and disgusting Xander is , he’s such a typical “friendzoned” “nice guy” and his reaction after Anya had sex with Spike after HE LEFT HER AT THE ALTER ew no go away forever. BtVS - Xander Harris = perfect show tbh.

sourwolve:

i get so offended when people say “you used to be so emo” like no. emo is not fleeting, its not a phase that you grow out of. emo is deeply rooted in your very soul and becomes who you are. once you go black you never go back. it is forever 2005 in my heart. 

When we ask [men] if they would like to be treated like the women in porn, they say ‘of course not, but that does not mean that those girls don’t, just because YOU wouldn’t like these things to be done to your body doesn’t mean that THEY do not like it’. Because ‘those girls’ are so different then us, than regular human beings…

The fact is that women have been brainwashed to think that enduring pain is an integral part of their duty of performing femininity. Women harm their feet to walk in high heels. Women voluntarily submit themselves to painful surgeries to have bigger breasts. They go through painful waxing procedures. Women are good women when they overcome their pain with a smile.

And now, thanks to porn, girls are seeking advice on the internet about how to give deepthroated blowjobs without puking and how to make anal sex less painful. Men are never expected to do such things.

comment by MissFit on Porn Part 11: The Difference Between Huffing Dong and Flipping Burgers 

"men in porn are paid to orgasm, while women are paid to suffer"

(via celestialfaun)

jencorpsichord:

young adult things: washing your colors with your whites because you don’t care you JUST don’t fucking care

Steroids taste fucking rank, do not recommend.

I have managed to sort out student finance and accommodation all in a mornings work but I still haven’t enrolled so it’s only a slight victory.

Tried to use an online booking system to get accommodation and it did not work, so I emailed them and she was like, you can either call us or use the online booking system so I’m gonna put it off til tomorrow cause down with phone calls.